The Christmas Carol War

Transcript from yesterday's car ride to the Sam's Club: [C and e are in the car. Radio playing in background. Song is "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer."]

C and e: Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer, reindeer.
C and e: Had a very shiny nose, like a lightbulb.
C and e: And if you ever saw it, saw it.
C and e: You would even saw it glows, like a lightbulb.
C and e: All of the other reindeer, reindeer.
C and e: Used to laugh and call him names, like Pinocchio.
C and e: They never let poor Rudolph, Rudolph.
C and e: Join in any reindeer games, like Monopoly.
C and e: Then one foggy Christmas eve, Santa came to say, ho ho ho.
C and e: Rudolph with your nose so bright, won't you guide our sleigh tonight.
C and e: Then how the reindeer loved him, loved him.
C and e: As they shouted out with glee,
[in unison] C: Whoopee!
e: Yippee! WHAT?! Did you just say whoopee? You're weird.
C and e: Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer, reindeer.
C and e: You'll go down in history,
[in unison] C: like George Washington.
e: like Columbus. WHAT?! Did you just say "like George Washington?" You're weird.
[End scene.]

So, who is right? Is it "whoopee" or "yippee?" Is it "like George Washington" or "like Columbus?" Inquiring minds want to know.

The Giving Thanks Post

I realize that Thanksgiving is already over, but it's not too late for me to post those things for which I am grateful. Like my friend Todd, I will forgo the obvious things (God, friends, family). Instead I will post those that may not be that obvious.

• First, I am grateful for running skirts. I got my first "real one" for my birthday this year and ran the Provo Half Marathon in it. I love it. It's longer than usual running shorts. It doesn't chafe between the thighs because of the spandex shorts. It doesn't ride up my legs. And, of course, it's super cute too.
• Second, I am grateful to be done with the first year of marriage. When people says it's the hardest of them all, well, let's just pray that's true.
• Third, I am grateful for the internet. I really don't know how people did things like plan trips, stay in touch with friends, or buy gifts without it. I have really enjoyed keeping this blog (it's much easier than a journal) as well as my other site (which you should really check out at least for the recipes).

Apparently I need to think about this more, but that's fine for now.

More Dreams

A couple of weeks ago I woke from a dream crying. Not just wimpering, but full-out sobbing. I don't remember ever doing this before C and I got married. The first time it happened (yes, it has happened multiple times) I was having a dream where one my nephews had all sorts of boils all over his face. I woke up bawling and had to have C console me. It was horribly tragic. I couldn't even tell Emily about the dream for a long time because I didn't want her to think I was some sort of prognosticator. I'm not; the boy is still as adorable as he was when I had the dream.

However, the most-recent dream wasn't nearly as sad. In this dream, my parents' house in Sandy was being invaded by little elves. They started by taking bites out of sandwiches, while invisible--whoa. Then they appeared in the corner and ordered us to get everyone together. I knew I had to get my cell phone (I mean, why wouldn't I need my cell phone?), but it was in the car. When I went outside to get the phone, I learned that my tires had been slashed, along with a couple of other cars in the parking lot. A guy there told me that the cops had already been called. But I was torn because I knew the elves would be mad if I didn't return quickly! The next thing I knew, I was sitting in my car when the Club (you know, the anti-theft device thingy) was magically raised and pointed directly at my head, like a gun would be. I was freaking out because I knew I had angered the elves. It was scary! Then I woke up crying. When I told C the dream, he just mumbled something and rolled over.

The honeymoon is officially over.

I'd Like to Bear My Testimony...

I'm not sure how sacrilegious this post is going to be. I certainly don't mean to offend anyone, so please don't be offended. Maybe I just need to find a better word than "testimony." But regardless, here goes.

Lately I have been thinking about things that are not necessarily religious, but things about which I have a testimony. I came up with the following two:

• I have a testimony of Thermarests. The last time C and I went to Shenandoah, we found out that my Thermarest had a hole in it. "No bother," thought I...foolishly! The first night, C gallantly offered to sleep on mine, and he gave me his fully-inflated Thermarest. However, after waking up the next day completely sore from the experience, he reneged on that the next night. Although thankfully I didn't have the same hurtful experience he did, I certainly did notice a LARGE difference between the non-padded sleeping experience and the padded sleeping experience. Padded wins.
• I have a testimony of endorphins. I don't care how tired I am from work; I don't care how much I don't want to go to the gym; I don't care how depressed I am about the overeating the day before; I always feel a million times better after going to the gym and getting in a good run. Always. Without exception. Invariably. QED.

What do you have a testimony of?

C's Christmas Present

If C got his Christmas wish...

Reality Stars

The other day C and I were discussing television. Shocker. I guess it's better than just watching it without talking about it. Anyway, this discussion focused on the following topic: "If you could be on any reality television show, which one would you choose?" Of course C said "Survivor." And of course I responded with, "You'd be voted off before even making the jury." And he would too; he thinks and analyzes way too much and anybody who thinks and analyzes way too much on this game (except for Richard Hatch) gets kicked off, and kicked off early. Sorry baby.

For me, I would love to be the new host of "Cash Cab." It's this funny game show on the Discovery Channel where unsuspecting cab-riders are surprised to find out they're on a trivia game show. I think it would be fun to make people happy in that manner. Although the driving in NYC might prove to be too much for my traffic-hating soul. Maybe I could do "Cash Cab: SLC" or something.

I would also love to be on "Design Star" on the HGTV channel. I certainly don't claim to be an excellent interior designer or even a good interior designer, but the contestants got to do the most fun tasks and created such cool things. I think it would be fun.

And finally, I think being on the "Amazing Race" would be awesome. However, I'm not sure that C and I could do this together if we wanted our marriage to last. Maybe R is up for it?

Our Giant

C and I have a new favorite grocery store. It's a Giant. We used to shop at an older but closer Giant, but have since been converted to this one. Why, you ask? A few reasons. First, it's not much farther than the old Giant. Second, it's much newer and therefore much nicer. Their produce is ten times better than the old Giant. Third, they have self-checkout! I love self-checkout. And fourth, and most importantly, the new Giant located by a HUGE retirement community. This means that in general, only old people shop there. (Sorry Mom and Dad, but according to the AARP, Social Security Administration, and a slew of restaurants offering senior citizen discounts, you're old!) Why does this matter? Because it means that the self-checkouts will forever be free because the 55+'ers won't touch that new-fangled technology! We love it!

The Couple that Does Stuff

My favorite radio program is one dubbed "Radio from Hell." Thanks to the wonders of the computer, I am able to listen to them every morning, even though it's broadcast from SLC. The crew is made up of two guys (Bill and Kerry) and one girl (Gina). Kerry is a big sci-fi nerd; Bill is...well, Bill. And then there's Gina. The boys area always picking on Gina for something or other. She's an extremely picky eater who is afraid of everything new. She's lazy and ditzy. But she is extremely funny, and the show would be much worse without her. She got married recently and now has this idea that she wants to be part of "the couple that does stuff." Now, it's not Gina's style to actually know what "stuff" she wants to do. Rather, it's more her style to just say she wants to do stuff, because truthfully everyone knows she'll never actually do anything. (Although, to her new husband's credit, it seems more likely that she'll do something with this new husband of hers.)

Anyway, I too want to be part of the couple that does stuff! And like Gina, I'm not sure what "stuff" this is exactly. While C and I get along extremely well (I'm convinced no one could put with me the way he does), I'm just afraid that we'll find ourselves 30 years into this marriage and have zero shared interests. I'm seriously concerned about this. He has comforted me slightly by telling me that we already have quite a few shared interests: running, watching movies (especially those of the independent variety), camping/hiking, traveling, and the new one, dancing. But I'm still concerned that this isn't enough.

Maybe once we have kids this will be a non-issue because we'll be so busy with kids that we won't even have time for one another. But I want it to be obvious to our kids why it is that we're together. I want them to know that their parents like each other and enjoy spending time together.

So I guess my questions are, am I the only concerned about this? If not, then what are others doing about this?

My New Second-Favorite Dog

Everyone knows I loves pugs. LOVE pugs. They're just the funniest dogs ever. Plus, they are quite hysterical looking. (Please don't say, "They're so ugly they're cute!" I hate that line. It's just not possible to be cute and ugly at the same time. You can say they're cute. You can say they're ugly. Just don't say they're both.) However, the other day, C and I went to a dog store because we were bored. Well, they had this mixed breed there that I had never seen: the puggle, a mix between pug and beagle. It was so freaking adorable. I looked them up on the internet and found some flattering pictures of them and some not-so-flattering pictures (the first dog pictured, for example).

Some day when we aren't living in the Grand Pre Ghetto; some day when we actually have a house with a garage; some day when we have an actual yard, we will have a dog. C is fine with this, and even fine with the fact that this dog will most likely be a pug named Ted. However, if we ever decide to add another dog to our family, I am going to seriously look into the puggle variety. C has already named the puggle "sponge bob puggle pants" or "puggle bob square pants" or something close to this. I love it.