Satan Really Doesn't Want Me to Go to Church

I received two phone calls this weekend. I'll relate the second call first, as it was far less harmless.

C and I had been out of the house, and when we returned, there was a message from a brother in the ward asking if we "would be willing to clean the church tomorrow, since we missed our scheduled day last Saturday." Let me say that our scheduled day was certainly NOT that previous Saturday. It was a few Saturdays ago, and we were there. But I decided that when I returned his phone call I wouldn't mention this insignificant fact. When I called him and told him that I'm sorry, but we're unable to help tomorrow morning, he then said that "Well, it's our ward's turn again in December...blah blah blah." So, of course, I had to say something. I waited for him to finish and said, "Actually, did you say on the message that we weren't there last Saturday? You're right. We were there on Saturday the 8th, as assigned." He was silent for a second and then said, "Oh, I must have had you mixed up with someone else." Darn straight you do.

Can I ask a couple of questions about this? I'm okay with him not being able to pick us out of a line-up, but we're talking names and numbers on sheet of paper. How can that get mixed up? Also, he never even comes on those Saturdays to see who is there and who isn't. How could he have even known if we had skipped out on cleaning the church? Maybe it's just his ploy to get people to feel bad for shirking their duty and guilt trip them into helping last minute. Ha! We're on to you Brother!

And now for the much more offensive call. It's easier if I report it in transcript form. I will be known as "me" and the caller will be known as "Miss Cleo," for reasons to become evident.

[Phone rings at the house of C and E. E answers. Please realize that we do not have caller ID at our house. Therefore the identity of the caller was unknown upon answering.]

me: Hello?
Miss Cleo: Good afternoon.
me: Hello??
Miss Cleo: Good afternoon.
me: Hello? [slightly annoyed]
Miss Cleo: Good afternoon.
me: Hello? [really annoyed and much louder]
Miss Cleo: Good afternoon.
me: Hello???? [I'm sure you can guess this one's tone.]
Miss Cleo: You know, it's okay to say "good afternoon" to me.
me: I didn't realize that I was supposed to say "good afternoon" to you.
Miss Cleo: Well in my country, if someone says "good afternoon," you should respond with "good afternoon."
me: Well, in my country, if someone keeps repeating "good afternoon" after I have said hello, I think it's because you can't hear me so I am going to keep repeating "hello." [Admittedly, I was probably getting a little snappy with Miss Cleo. But I really don't like people telling me how I should respond.]
Miss Cleo: Well you don't have to be like that.
me: Well I do. I'm just telling you that since we're in my country, this is how things work. I shouldn't be expected to know what you want me to say.
Miss Cleo: [Almost chuckling] Well, you're certainly a Leo, aren't you?
me: Well, yes, but that's besides the point....

Conversation soon comes to an end. She made me so upset that I was in tears about this. Reason? She made me feel like I couldn't even tell anyone about this (not even C, but too late because he was sitting on the couch listening to the entire conversation) because I would come across as the insensitive, hot-headed, bratty, snotty girl who can't even return a "good afternoon" when given one.

As a confession, I am extremely sensitive about this. I know that I'm not the same person I was when I was an undergrad in Utah. I know that living on the East Coast has made me really impatient of check writers at the grocery store, among other things. I have enough self-awareness to realize the changes that have taken place in me after moving to D.C, and possibly due to being 10 years older. Regardless of these recently-adopted quality traits, I still thought I was in the right. But I feared that when I told people this story, they would tell me to my face that that I did the right thing. Behind my back, however, they'd opine that I flew off the handle and should have just given her a "good afternoon."

And, how dare she then resort to astrology to explain this? Astrology?! What business is it of hers what sign I am? And how is that even relevant to our conversation!? ARGH. I vowed never to speak to her again. C is now on permanent phone answering duty.

Of course these two incidents were not enough to drive me to inactivity. They came from two members of the ward with whom I have very little contact. However, I do wonder if this would have been different if Miss Cleo were the RS president? Would I stay away from RS until she was released? I honestly don't know. But given the hurt I felt from Miss Cleo, I now have a small understanding of how people can be offended enough to stop coming to church.